Archive for January, 2006

Slightly surreal Starbucks

Unlike many coffee shop afficianados I don’t have a big problem with Starbucks. In the land of the cheap caff, the one place to get a vaguely decent coffee is king and all that. I’m not about to bemoan the complete lack of independent coffee shops near me though (well, at least not right now anyway). As long as Starbucks maintains their fair trade alternative I’ll shop there, until something better comes along.

Some visits to Starbucks are more memorable than others. The one when they’d completely run out of Rocky Road definitely sticks in my mind as a bad one for example. I don’t think I’m going to forget today’s in rush though.

It boded well from the off. Not only were they actually promoting their fair trade coffee (bit of a shocker I know) but they were even giving away free samples of it. Wonder what the Starbucks project websites would make of that?

One of the attractive things about Starbucks (admittedly this isn’t restricted to just Starbucks but to coffee shops in general) is the range of people they attract. They’re a real microcosm of society. Right now I’m sat between an old married couple (doing the traditional old married couple behaviour of not talking to each other) and a heavily pierced goth. Just across from me is a Moleskine writing, Razr toting fashionista. Sharing the table with me are 2 of the most competitive and self obsessed sloaney ladies who lunch that I’ve ever eavesdropped on (this conversation was brought to you by the expression “Yes, its the most expensive one they do.”). Then, of course, there’s me, sitting here blogging. Bizzarely all these very different types of people feel at home here. What’s that about then? The coffee shop world is truly surreal.

I’m settled in for the afternoon to catch up on some writing, while others come and go. Queing for another coffee I realise I’m standing next to Blackburn manager Mark Hughes, who is complaining at the size of his take out being too big. As the Barista said, its not like you can’t afford it Mark and you don’t have to drink it all anyway. Perhaps he’s not read all the blogs posting about the arcane secrets of the Starbucks short coffee. What’s he doing here and not on the training ground anyway?

The shop begins to empty, meaning that anyone new comes in has a too much choice dilemma. No, not what to drink, but where to sit. 2 bag laden shoppers play musical tables before finally settling on their choice.

The sloane rangers get up to leave. One asks me if I’m writing a book. Not having the balls to say to them “No, I’m bitching about your conversation” I say instead “No, I’m blogging”. I can’t work out whether or not she is disappointed or confused. Blogging may be important (to other bloggers at least) but it doesn’t seem to have infiltrated their world yet.

There’s always a story at Starbucks. You’ve just got to be prepared for it to be a slightly surreal one. Just like reality I suppose.

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Sharing a coffee

A big hello to any readers who have arrived here today from The year of coffee blog (see Lloyd, I can get the name right sometimes!) where I had a guest coffee posted today.

It’s always nice to share a coffee! Thanks to Lloyd for letting me share that one with him and his readers.

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Craft project – how to make your own confetti

In an attempt to rescue “crafts” from being synonymous with “card making” I’ve decided to share this great step by step technique a friend of mine discovered to making your own confetti.

1. Get a large and expensive new cross cut shredder at work.

2. Read on the box that it could even shred a newspaper.

3. Decide to test out this claim immediately with a large broadsheet paper, for some unknown reason folded in half.

4. Turn shredder on, feed newspaper into jaws of paper death.

5. Laugh with work colleagues as it seems to be living up to the claim on the box.

6. Note how large shredder begins to labour and make strange grinding noise.

7. Panic that you might be breaking brand new expensive office shredder.

8. Try to remedy the situation by hitting the reverse button.

9. Step back and enjoy as your office is now showered in your very own cross cut newspaper confetti.

10. Really panic about how on earth you’re going to be able to clear all this up without getting in trouble.

11. Take rest of the day off sick. Cut and run.

So there you go, that’s how its done. I’ll try and share some more great crafting ideas soon (whenever any friends do something stupid I can twist around!).

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But I wanna go….

I’m a bit of a coffee shop junkie. When I say a bit, I mean a lot. And I’m always on the lookout for that perfect one to be “my” coffee shop.

I was very excited to find this coffee shop recently then Cafeggio Coffee. It had it all, practically everything I’d imagined my perfect coffee shop to have. Great coffee was a must obviously, but there had to be cakes and proper food to facilitate a really long stay. To have a really long stay there’s got to be long opening hours too (which you don’t get in my neck of the woods). All looking good for Cafeggio so far.

Free wifi is just a pipe dream round my way, but not at Cafeggio. How about comfy chairs for when you want to sit and read, but chairs and tables for when you want to work? Yep. Regular live music? That too. It’s got to be said, Cafeggio has got everything. There’s just one problem.  It’s in Texas and, quite frankly, I’m not. I’m not even in the USA. I think I’m going to have to keep looking for my coffee shop.

Hey, at least its fun looking!

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Blondes and PCs

A client of mine has 3 blondes working in an office of 9 and I regularly have to fix their computers. In honour of them, I couldn’t resist linking to this blonde joke.

Hey, its not PC, but I couldn’t resist linking.

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Forwarded

I’ve got acquaintances who like to forward email. A lot of email, made up of those “funnies,” “vital info” and “heartwarming thoughts” that you just can’t do without. Apparently.

I hate these emails.

Why do people send them? Why can’t they work out what the BCC button is for on their email client so my email address doesn’t go out to be hoovered up by whatever spambot is running the PC’s of people who keep telling me the wonders of Viagra and Cialis and how they’ll make me a real man?

Thankfully, a friend who shares my opinion (and also shares the same “forward to” acquaintances) sent the email below on to me. Finally, an email worth forwarding. If someone forwards you an email, fight back with this -

The Perfect Forwarding Email

My heartfelt appreciation goes out to all of you who have taken the time and trouble to send me “forwards” over the past 12 months. Thank you for making me feel safe, secure, blessed and healthy.

* Extra thanks to whoever sent me the email about rat poo in the glue on envelopes – cause I now have to go get a wet towel every time I need to seal an envelope.

* Also, I scrub The top of every can I open for the same reason. Because of your genuine concern, I no longer drink Coca Cola because it I know it can remove toilet stains, which is not exactly an appealing characteristic.

* I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS.

* I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.

* I no longer go to shopping malls because someone might drug me with a perfume sample and rob me.

* I no longer eat KFC because their “chickens” are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers.

* I no longer worry about my soul because at last count, I have 363,214 angels looking out for me.

* Thanks to you, I have learned that God only answers my prayers if I forward an e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.

* I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl on the internet who is about to die in the hospital (for the 1,387,258th time).

* I no longer have any money at all in fact – but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special on-line email program.

Yes, I want to thank you all so much for looking out for me that I will now return the favour! If you don’t send this e-mail to at least 144,000 people in the next 7 minutes, a large pigeon with a wicked case of the runs will land on your head at 5:00 PM (EST) this afternoon. I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my next door neighbor’s ex-mother-in-law’s second husband’s cousin’s beautician.

DO IT NOW OR ELSE.

And have a nice day!

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Surely not?

On late night radio last night (this morning??) the “send in your” interlude between songs was strange street names, which producing an interesting mix of the quirky, the charming and (overwhelmingly) the nudge, nudge, wink, wink funny.

I did feel for the individual living in the village of Badgers Mount whose street address was Badgers Rise (imagine telling a call centre operative your address as a security question) but surely the STD clinic in Crab Street can’t have been real, can it?

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No sales update

1 week of the no sales project completed and so far, so good. Not that its been easy though.

Last week saw a few necessary supermarket shopping trips, which meant avoiding all those mega bargain dvd’s and cd’s. Temptation is always pretty big here at the best of times, because they’re so cheap and you can always find room for another dvd, right? There’s a lot to be said for pushing your trolley through those aisles as fast as possible, or not going down them at all!

Petrol stations have their own strange temptations too. It’s all too easy to pick up some chocolate on the way to the till and chocolate is a definite weakness of mine. Do I need it? No, but its definitely been difficult to walk past.

The hardest part of the project to keep to so far has been not causing anything to be bought for you. If someone buys you a present and you didn’t know about it then that’s great, enjoy, but if you’re in a shop and a friend asks you “would you like….” its difficult to say no and not appear ungracious. A little “thanks but no thanks” explanation goes a long way here.

Today has had particular temptations, in the form of a coffee shop trip, followed by a book shop – both huge weak points! Maintaining the big yes to simple hospitality a basic cappucino instead of my usual all singing, all dancing mega cup didn’t diminish my enjoyment of cafe culture at all and in some ways made me appreciate it more. It’s not about the coffee, its about enjoying the moment with the people you’re with. The book shop was thankfully easier than I thought it would be, but I definitely had to stop myself from looking too much!

On the whole sticking with the project hasn’t been easy, but its definitely been easier than I thought it would be. Lets hope its not uphill from here. I’ll keep you posted.

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IT Agony Bingo

Today’s User Friendly cartoon has the life of the IT worker in a nutshell.

It’s got to be the best User Friendly cartoon I’ve ever seen, which says a lot for geeks.

I swear I fill the IT Agony Bingo card every week.

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Keeping it simple

It may be Saturday night, but I’m enjoying a quiet one. Reading and enjoying simple fayre like bread, cheese and pickles, washed down with some fairtrade beer.

Probably boring, but I’m happy being boring.

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